With St. Patrick’s Day and green beer right around the corner, you will undoubtedly see the city’s bars fill up with a few of these people. Hey, you might even be one of them!
The Crier: This is the girl (sometimes guy) who gets extremely emotional when they are drunk. Half of the time they are upset by what someone else said. The other half of the time they are so ecstatic they have you in their life and you just mean so much to them. A night on the town isn’t over until there is some sort of emotional talk that leads to tears.
Everybody’s BFF: You know that person who is buddy-buddy with everyone. They introduce you to the person they met five minutes ago as their new best friend. Apparently, they meet at least five new BFFs per night out—and don’t remember their names the next morning.
The Morse Code Texter: I truly can’t believe there is no such thing as a Breathalyzer app on our smartphones yet. This person’s text are encrypted and there is no way of understanding what the person is saying. It’s highly doubtful that they even know what they are trying to say.
The One Who Calls Their Ex: This is the person that has not talked to their ex-lover in four months, but after a night of drinking, has decided that they miss their ex-lover and can’t see their lives without them. No matter how hard you try and persuade them that calling their ex at 4am is not a good idea, it happens anyway every time.
The Puker: Ugh…if the pre-drink is at your house you always try to avoid inviting this person. They puke before and after the bar. Sometimes the puker can be a real jackass who leaves your washroom in a state of horror.
The One Who Insists They Aren’t Drunk: This person is usually slurring their words and holding on to the wall to walk, but they insist they are not even drunk! Their tag line is “I’M SOOOO SOBER.”
The Moron: It isn’t a good night for this person unless they end up in the drunk tank. Halfway through the night you won’t be able to find this person. The most possible reason behind their sudden disappearance is that the cops had already picked them up for one of their crazy drunk stunts.
The Sleepy Head: If they actually stay awake to make it to the bar, you will find them huddled in one of the bathroom stalls using the toilet as a pillow. They also tend to be the person that wakes up with drawings on their face.
